Positive Expectations

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Positive Expectations

Rank Test Lecture by Grandmaster Gedo Chang June 22, 2018

Kathy, a green belt was my Hapkido student a few years ago. She was 21 years old. Her tuition was a couple weeks past due. One evening she came into my office and said, Master Chang I will pay my tuition a week later after I come back from my ski trip for 5 days in Colorado. I said to her “at this moment you are 2 weeks past due, what is the correlation between Hapkido tuition and your ski trip?” Kathy firmly replied, “Master Chang, in case I break my leg during my ski trip, then I cannot continue Hapkido practice, can I?” I was astonished by Kathy’s negative notion. However, a week later after her ski trip, she came into my school with crutches. Her one leg was in a cast. She said, “Master Chang, I had a ski accident and broke my left leg.” Kathy looked very cocky and proudly confident. She seemed to have found the good excuse to why she had not paid her tuition.

A 11 year old boy named Danny was a yellow belt. He was practicing Hapkido, preparing for his blue belt. A couple days before the rank test he still had not applied for the test. I called him into my office after the evening class, I said today is the last day to hand in your test application. I have not received yours yet, is there any reason why? Danny replied, “I should wait until last minute of the rank test day.” I asked him why? He said to me, “In case I get sick I cannot go for the rank test. My mom suggests me to wait until the last minute. I was shocked about his negative comment and his mothers negative expectations. I asked Danny’s father to come into my office when he came to pick Danny up and we had a conversation regarding positive expectations. In other words, the importance of positive expectations from parents and Teachers and how this effects their school grades, attitude, behavior, even their health. Danny’s father showed the attitude that he and his wife's way to treat children was fine . He reluctantly promised me Danny’s test application would be submitted by the following day. However Danny did not show up the following day. I was about to lock my school door the following evening and heard the telephone ring. It was Danny’s mother, she said “Master Chang, Danny cannot go to the rank test tomorrow. I asked why?, She replied Danny is very sick. Last night his body temperature went up above normal and he was throwing up all night, so we took him to the emergency room. I asked, Is he ok now? She said “Yes he is fine today.” “I said” he is capable to come to the test Tomorrow isn’t he? His mother said, his doctor told him he should not do anything for about a week. So Danny missed the rank test. However the following Monday after the rank test he came back to Hapkido and practiced as usual with no signs of weakness, inspire that the doctor had said he should not do anything for a week. Sigmund Freud said the main motive for human action is wish. But according to my understanding wish itself cannot motivate human action because I believe wish plus positive expectations together is the motive for action.

When we have positive expectation we can act! This means we have hope. Karl Menninger said in his book “The Human Mind” Hope is consciousness of a realizable wish! If so, what is dispare? Karl Menninger also said despair is self-imposed inhibition of a non-realizable wish. I want you to understand our children's health, talent, abilities, school grades ect… are absolutely related to parent and teacher expectations. Any action without positive expectations will produce helplessness. Helplessness is the main cause of most human disease mentally or physically.

When cockroaches fight each other the loser dies shortly after. Even though there is no physical injury. It is a proven fact in psychology. A German philosopher in the 19th century, Schopenhauer said, “Despair is the disease that leads to death.” Positive expectations that can be accomplished by everyone is called confidence. We all should give our loved ones positive expectations.

A noted literature author, Goethe said: “What do you want your loved ones to become? You should treat them the way you want them to be!”

Thank You
Grand Master Gedo Chang